I'm sick to death of "upselling."

My cell phone was stolen. Went to a store for a new one. First thing out of the kid's mouth: "OK, we can upgrade you." Didn't want an upgrade. Wanted the same phone. The kid denied my old model still existed. I pointed at the one in the display case. He said they didn't have it in stock. I was halfway to my car when one materialized, praise be.

Called the cable company for service. Got the service. Also got a pitch for a special rate on the HBO/ Cinemax combo. I'm sick to death of Sopranos hype; I don't want HBO.

Went to the supermarket. Got a box of Puffs. And a 40-cents-off coupon for a box of Kleenex. Dropped it in the trash on my way out. I buy maybe two boxes of tissues a year. I don't care what brand, and I don't care where I buy them.

Managed to make a dent in my credit-card debt. Got an oily letter a week later asking if I paid off the card because I plan to cancel it? Would a shiny low-rate line of credit change my mind? Hmm? Hmm? Pretty please?

I'm sick to death of three-days-on-the-job kids in the Parts department looking at the monitor, mispronouncing my name and saying, "I see your Family Truckster is due for its 15,000-mile maintenance. Can I schedule an appointment for you?" No. I'm here in Parts, rather than Service, so I can do it myself, Einstein.

Here's the thing. Remember when the Macintosh came out, and suddenly every memo was written in 16 typefaces? The technology was there, so people used it.

CRM tools have arrived. Many businesses have done a nice job of integrating them with databases. Any clerk can pull up a complete history of any customer. The technology's there, so people use it.

But the world got sick to death of those hallucinogenic Mac-created memos pretty quickly.

Judicious use of the technology is the secret. It always seems to take a while for people to learn that.

Here's why it matters to you: IT used to tell the board why the company couldn't do certain things. Then IT wised up and started telling the board how the company could do things. That's where CRM stands now -- you can gather data on customers and use it at the point of sale, so you do.

Next challenge: Develop the confidence to tell the board that although you can do something, it may be smarter not to. That's right: It may be wiser to turn your back on some data-gathering and upselling opportunities in favor of less-intruded-upon customers.

It's a tough sell. It's also what they pay you for. Whether they like what you tell them or not.